You’ve just created your first WordPress website. Great. Now you’re probably looking for the quickest way to destroy it. There are so many easy ways to destroy your own blog that we’ve created a list to tell you which ones are the best!
Attention: This is a humorous article about everything you should not do with your website. The steps listed below should be avoided as they are actually effective in destroying websites. If you want to know how much it costs to develop a new website, read our explanatory article here. If you need further assistance, talk to us now.
Who needs security?
You just started your blog. No one reads it except you and your family. Why take any kind of security measures? No hacker would attack a site with no traffic, right?
In fact, many WordPress sites can become victims of attacks. Hackers don’t want our credit card details, they want to steal our bandwidth. They want to host some illegal data on our server. They want to use our website as a host for malware that will attack visitors. A new WordPress site, without any security, is a prime target for a hacker.
Hackers don’t attack websites personally – they use bots. Bots can attack multiple websites in a short period of time. Neglecting security from the start will result in your website being infected and destroyed in no time.
An even more effective way to destroy a website is to have the login as “admin” and the password as “1234” – it’s a big favor you do to hackers.
Another good way to sabotage your own website is to not use security plugins, such as WP Cerber or MalCare, which protect against brute force attacks. Also avoid updating WordPress and plugins. The less up-to-date the software is, the greater the chances of destroying a website.
The cheapest accommodation is the best!
If you're just starting out, why go for a competitive price? It's best to pay just 99 cents, or even free.
And that’s exactly what you should do if you don’t want to attract visitors! Choose a cheap shared hosting platform. This will make your website so slow that Google will completely ignore it and not even show it in its results. Any visitors who do come to your website will quickly abandon it because they are tired of waiting. Can you imagine someone waiting for a website for more than 2 minutes?
Low-cost hosting companies also rarely have any kind of redundancy. If your server goes down, it stays down. And so does your website. And if you don't have a backup, you'll have to build your website from scratch. Or leave it dead.
Better yet, choose sites that don't use WordPress. It will be even slower.
Don't make backups
If your site goes down for any reason, there are a few ways to recover it without a backup. But sometimes, a significant portion of your site will be lost anyway, and we'll have to rebuild it. It's normal to feel like giving up. That's okay, the best thing to do is just let it die.
If you have backups, your website will live a little longer, unfortunately. But if you really want it to be destroyed, it is best to forget about making backups, for example, even before a major update. There is still hope, but if you have a plugin for automatic backups, such as BackupBuddy, all hope of destroying your website will be ruined, as the site will become immortal.
Use the wrong theme
Want your website to showcase your photography work? Choose a theme for writers! Want a simple website to showcase your writing portfolio? Choose the most expensive theme possible with all sorts of useless features! Better yet, don't choose a theme with mobile integration, because nobody uses the Internet on their mobile phones these days. That way, your website will only be accessible to those using a PC or Mac. People will call you an old man from Restelo, but no one will accuse you of having no principles.
The wrong theme will make your site unappealing and difficult to use. If it doesn't work on mobile, your site will repel 90% from the population.
There is an even worse problem. Google doesn't like sites that aren't optimized for mobile, which means your site will be ignored based on your poor theme choice. Google has its favorites, the ones that work on mobile, the ones that are fast, and the ones that have good content and display it well. These are the ones that show up in searches. The others are hidden, and that's a good thing. If you want your site to have no traffic whatsoever and die of loneliness, choose the wrong theme.
Install ALL plugins!
Plugins are great! And many of them are free - so why not get them all? Get some SEO plugins, because the more the merrier. Right? Some anti-spam plugins too (even if no one comments on your posts). Statistics plugins, so we know how many people don't visit our site. Is the site going to be a personal blog? Get the WooCommerce plugin, because you never know when you won't need it!
Too many plugins will slow down your website considerably. And if you’re really lucky, too many will even collide and create conflicts, causing even more problems! So what are you waiting for?
Cheat with SEO (Search Engine Optimization)
You’ve heard about SEO. You know it’s important to attract more visitors and maybe make some money from your website. You’ve read somewhere that it’s a laborious task. You need to build a fast and responsive website, and publish lots of high-quality original content (well-written, because Google cares about that). Nobody has time for that!
But you have found someone online who is willing to sell you some backlinks for a few euros! It is certainly legitimate and will bring you good results, considering that it is ignored by Google search results. If you are lucky, your site may even be penalized for being associated with untrustworthy sources.
What else can you do to destroy your website's optimization? Overuse keywords, overuse meta tags with too many unrelated keywords. Write texts that repeat several phrases without offering any kind of content. Instead of gaining trust by publishing high-quality content, take shortcuts. Your website will quickly disappear completely from Google's indexing.
Use copyrighted images. Don't optimize!
You need attractive images to make your website attractive, we all know that. Where can you get them? It's simple! When you see an image you like, copy it and publish it on your website! It doesn't matter if you don't have the rights to it. No one will find out.
Do this. Not only will it get your site shut down, it could even get you fined or sent to jail if you use an image of someone you don't find funny.
While we’re at it, you should publish the largest images possible and avoid using them for SEO purposes. Don’t add footers, descriptions, or titles. Just fill your website with as many giant, non-personal images as you can.
If you really don't want to go to jail for stealing someone else's intellectual property, try using free stock images with the CC0 license.
Killing your website has never been easier. Some of the above techniques will kill you instantly while others will only poison you more slowly, kind of like the effect of tobacco on a human being. Choose your weapon carefully, and start destroying your website wisely now.
If you don't want to destroy your website but have doubts about what you're doing, schedule a consult with us! If you need a new website, find out how much a new website can cost here.
